I just got sent an article on how to break the ice. It boiled down to ‘Two truths and a lie’, ‘Rock-Paper-Scissors’ and ‘Don’t begin by asking someone what their biggest regrets are.’
Sound advice. Although organising a rock-paper-scissors tournament at the beginning of your marketing network conference might not go down well with everyone. That feels like day 2 when the ice has already been nicely broken and you’re ready to chunk it into a glass with some gin, some tonic, and a slice of lemon.
Similarly, the old ‘two truths and a lie’ game is probably not an icebreaker either. As you sit there in a circle, trying to come up with two unlikely scrapes you’ve been in that sound ‘close to unbelievable’ plus one lie that is the opposite, while also listening to everyone else do the exact same thing, in turn, there’s nothing but tension in the room. No-one wants to feel like they’re back at school again.
“At your event,” continues the author, “More talking equals more socialising equals more fun.”
I think the mechanics of socialising is really complex. People are different. Ice melts more naturally than it breaks, and clearly with time, a group of strangers will thaw into friendship circles all by themselves. It’s happened in every workplace, church group, classroom and band I’ve ever been in. Sure, not everyone has got along with everyone; if that’s the goal of ice breakers, it’s already an impossible one. But eventually people form, storm and norm with well-proven predictability. You don’t need to take a hammer to a party.
My pal Matt reminded me that at my stag do a couple of weeks ago, the assembled lads bought me an assortment of tools - including (you guessed it) a hammer, which Matt himself had specially decorated. So there you go; always an exception. Though no icebreaking needed.
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