Thinking about words today. Mostly because I got a group text containing the word 'heed' which was neither connected to the word 'warning' nor used in a deliberately medieval fashion. I know, right. It made me chuckle a bit if I'm honest. Funny how some words go together.
Then I had to compose a writing test for our interview candidates. I called it a 'task' to take the pressure out of the word 'test' but to be honest... it is a test. It strikes me that Lord Sugar uses exactly the same tactic.
My tes..ask.. is one of those Spot The Errors things where things are badly formatted and break all the rules. I don't like writing things like this, not because I don't enjoy the challenge of it, but mostly because it always feels exactly like I'm trying to set a trap - and I'm not. I'm trying to find an apprentice, not a mouse. And it's not supposed to be the Krypton Factor.
Golly. It occurs to me that that reference might not mean anything to most people. If you're young enough not to know what on earth the Krypton Factor was, don't worry, I'm really not trying to catch you out. Look it up on Wikipedia. It was awesome - in a 1980s kind of way.
As if to further my thinking about words, I then got an email from the chaps at Thomas Cook. Ever since I went to Italy, they've been pestering me to go on holiday again. That's how it works nowadays - buy a thing from anyone like that and they come hounding you like street sellers round a group of tourists.
Anyway, the email was clearly written to maximise the use of words, just like restaurant menus are designed to make your mouth water.
"The cold winter months are a great time to escape to warm beaches. We have loads of great destinations both close to home and in more exotic locations from around the world. So however you want to spice up your winter, we have the perfect holiday for you, all at a great price."
Oh you clever-sneaky marketing copywriters. Exotic, beaches, great price, perfect holiday. Cold winter? Warm beaches?... Mmmm... These are not just beaches... these are warm Thomas Cook beaches, baked by the exotic sunshine of a perfect summer sun, lapped by the turquoise waves gently soothing the hot white sand and the cool shade of the palm trees... think about that as you sit there in your double jumpers with a mug of Lemsip and the unfurling gas bill.
Oh there's more...
"Gran Canaria is home to a host of interesting landscapes. From desert sand dunes to beautiful beaches, picturesque towns and rocky wilderness, there's something for everyone to fall in love with. An island with a truly unique character, just waiting to be explored."
You've got to admit, it paints a picture for you doesn't it? I'll be honest, I think most people who sell anything, paint pictures for you inside your head. I think they even call it 'selling the sizzle, not the steak', don't they? They all do it; they all paint the lid of the chocolate box with the perfect picture. This could be you, little boy, surrounded by supermodels when you use this deodorant. Oh you don't want your cat to be left out when everyone else is using our brand of cat food, do you? Poor kitty. Take two bottles into the shower? You luddite.
This email mentions beaches at least five times. It's almost as if that is the main thing people think of when they think of holidays. Heavens above.
Well, I've wandered off topic and back onto one of my many hobby-horses. I used to write this stuff too, and I got a bit fed up of stuffing my copy full of the same old hackneyed phrases that were designed to get people buying stuff they didn't need - while simultaneously offering up my writing to the Great Google who decided whether or not we were packing our writing full of SEO keywords. It's no way to live, that. Still... if you're looking for a dynamic and fulfilling career in one of the UK's top marketing agencies, where you can really make your mark with your natural creativity and style... this is an opportunity we don't think you can afford to miss. You can.
I looked back over my test. There were over a hundred possible corrections and lots of room for flexibility and flair. True, there were some pitfalls and some things that could be open to interpretation. Nothing about exotic beaches though.
No comments:
Post a Comment