"I just want to do something with a bit of adrenaline," I said, excitedly, "Something that's exciting, something where you might die and you can throw yourself off..."
"...I'm starting to get worried about you," said Nell, predictably, raising an eyebrow. "You know there'll be little kids there," she said. I quickly realised that my eyes were wild with the possibility of nearly killing myself, and I was looking a little mad. It is only a climbing wall, Stubbsy.
Perhaps there are other options for exciting-but-not-quite-deadly-fun? How about a bungee jump?
Apparently only 20 people have ever died from bungee jumping and it's about as dangerous as a 100 mile car trip. You can get an eye-haemorrhage though.
Would I do it? Standing on a platform with my arms outstretched, the wind blustering through my hair, and my feet lashed together? Would I jump? Would I chicken out?
Same with a parachute - though I'd do a tandem jump, I think. That way, someone else (who's survived this horrific idea at least once already) decides for you when the two critical moments will happen - the jumping and the pulling the parachute cord open. That'd be fun, strapped to another person for dear life while the Earth spins beneath you.
What about white-water rafting? Down-to-earth but soaking. Higher risk factor though - about 1 in 250,000 people die doing that, and mostly it seems from heart attacks. I think if I'm going to go out with style, I don't want to be cold and drenched, draped out on slippery rocks, breathing my last through a soggy wetsuit.
Warmer and dryer would be bull-fighting. That'd get the old adrenaline pumping. Cruel to animals though isn't it - plus I think you have to be either Spanish or a ladies' man, a casanova gentleman matador, quick on his feet and smooth with the signoritas. I can pretend to be Spanish...
Hang-gliding? Microlighting? Base-jumping? See parachuting. I think hang-gliding would be the most fun out of those but I'm not quite sure how you land, given that you're effectively being carried on thermals while tucked up in a sleeping bag.
Ski-ing or snowboarding would be alright. Expensive pursuits those. Plus, my incredible foray into the world of ice-skating has persuaded me that most winter sports are just innovative ways to torture your feet. I enjoyed the Alps in 1998, yes, but mostly because my uni pals and I spent the week playing Uno in a ski-lodge.
No I think climbing might be a good place to start. It'll fuel the endorphins and get the heart racing but it's not dangerous, wet, expensive or difficult... I hope. And it's better than staying in with biscuits, endless tea and old episodes of Inspector Morse.
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