THE GOOD DUDE

I've just been called a 'good dude' (in a text message) and I made a face as though I didn't quite understand.

I've never heard those two words together before. I've heard people say, "Dude!" and "He's a dude!" attributing some element of coolness to the person in question. I've even heard my Mum say I was a 'cool dude' (shudder) but never in all my nerdy days have I ever heard of anyone being a 'good dude'.

That implies that there can be bad dudes, that dudeness can somehow be rated, and isn't (as I had assumed) a kind of on-off switch. Maybe the days when you could be either a dude or not a dude are over. It's all about how dudey you are.

Slow news day? I should coco. The most exciting thing that's happened so far was a gigantic rainbow over the motorway behind the trees. It was bold and beautiful in all its yellowy-green-and-violet glory.*

Apparently a 'dude' was originally just a very well-dressed man - perhaps someone who pushed the boundaries of fashion and made the unusual the desirable. These culture-changing trendsetters are few and far between though, and I certainly think that that definition counts me out. I had a quick look round the office. No-one else is wearing an outdoor scarf over a shirt and tanktop combination it seems. Maybe I'm not that great a dude.

Of course, if there is a spectrum of dudes, it does open up the possibility of being a better dude.

Who wouldn't want to be a better dude? And I'm not talking about being fashionable, I mean just cooler in general. Or maybe just determined not to be a bad dude. If I'm going to take on dudeship, I'm taking it on well, with a view to self-improvement! I don't just want to be a good dude, I want to be a better one, racing up the steps on the dude scale towards 'incredible dude' and maybe eventually the dizzy heights of 'awesome dude'.

You know what though? Now that I think about it, it might have been me misreading the text message in the first place. It was...

"Let me know when good dude and I will come over..."

and not...

"Let me know when, good dude, and I will come over..."

... which possibly means that I'm not necessarily a 'good dude' after all. It's also reassuring because my friend hasn't suddenly started talking like some sort of medieval surfer.




*I'm not going over this again: 'Richard of York' might well have given battle in vain, but for the red-green colourblinders, it may as well have been anybody.