IS IT OKAY TO DAYDREAM?

You know what I’d like to do? I’d like to compose music for films. I’d like to spend my days with people, scrunching up pieces of paper while I sit at the piano, and they pace the room. I’d like to imagine soaring, sweeping violins; French horns that pipe in at just the right moment to make your skin tingle, percussion that pounds into a theme as the car chase unfolds - that kind of thing.

I’d like to think up pretty piano music as the girl takes one last look over her shoulder down the autumnal avenue of houses. Or the little tsk of brush on cymbals as the heist begins.

I doubt I’ll get to do that. I’ve buttered my bread the wrong side of Hollywood, and in any case, I actually wouldn’t be very good at film-score composition. I’m genuinely not a good enough musician to make this work, and I suspect my lack of skill would quickly be evident if I chucked in the technical writing and gave this a go.

Some days though, I wonder if I’m any good at that either. I’ve long puzzled over why the dullest jobs are the ones that pay enough to live your life, while the creative dreamers out there are mostly living on peanuts. I’m sure there are lots of answers - the industrial revolution, yeah; capitalism, sure. I know. I know the answer really. I just think it’s quite unfair that the things I’m really good at will probably never make me a living, and the things I’m mediocre at will always be the better paid, more stable choice. I’m not alone either - there are lots of us out there daydreaming.

She slings her bag over her shoulder and climbs aboard the bus. The music shifts gear with her, adding a little violin and a resonant cello to the melody of the piano. She smiles at her own reflection as the piano arpeggios up the scale, slowly hitting that final major chord, that glimmer of hope and possibility as the bus rumbles out of town and the credits roll.

Is it okay to daydream? I hope so, because without it I’m not sure I know how to live in this grey old world.