LIKING PEOPLE

Sometimes people say I’m very wise. It’s always seemed a bit like saying a giraffe is very quiet. True some of the time, but probably not the the thing that strikes you most about giraffes.

Anyway, I wonder about exploding that myth today. After all, I found myself asking a question I’m pretty sure wise people don’t have to.

Are we supposed to like everyone?

I mean, generally speaking I try to. I try to like everyone. It’s fuelled by a belief that we all have goodness in us, that there’s gold to be found in even the toughest terrain, and that by liking people I might get closer to finding it. I think Jesus likes people.

But it occurred to me today that there are a few character traits I really don’t like, and find hard to get on with. And I’m having a bit of a harder time separating out the person from their character.

Should I tell you what those traits are? See, it’s complicated because I feel like I’m opening a door for people not to like me either. What if I describe you? And even though being disliked has happened to me a few times with a few people, I’d generally rather be liked than not liked. Wise or not, it’s kind of human I think, to crave that.

Sammy said that as followers of Jesus, we should love everyone and that love is different to liking. It’s logical - your enemies are your enemies for a reason and Jesus implores us to love them. Presumably liking them is a different matter?

But I don’t know how to do that. I don’t feel I’ve got that bit of wisdom worked out. Could I make tea for someone I dislike? I feel as though somewhere in the tea-making process I’d have to start liking them. And if I mean what I say about everyone having gold somewhere in them, then there’s always something to like, even if there’s a whole mix of stuff that’s really unpleasant.

Finally, if I go round telling people I believe the Bible, then I have to say that I also believe that every one of the nine billion humans on this planet is ‘made in the image of God’. And I feel queasy about disliking anything that’s made in his image. Don’t you?

Nevertheless, I found someone’s opinions and behaviour challenging today, and it made me ask the question - the question that wise people have already figured out.

I think some people really are harder to like. I reckon some of them will always push my buttons, make me cringe, make me cross, make me cry. I probably have the same effect on others too! I don’t think I have room to be paranoid about it, it’s just statistically got to be true.

Harder but not impossible. And for some reason, wise or otherwise, I do think it’s worth trying. And then when it doesn’t seem so easy, I also think it’s probably worth not overthinking it and just getting on with being me.

That can’t be too unwise can it?