CHATTING WITH DAVE

I’m chatting to Dave online at an insurance company. Dave might well be a robot but I can’t tell.

I can’t type, “Dave, are you a real person?” because if he is, he’ll be offended. And if he isn’t, then the algorithm will kick in and then pretend to be offended, just to keep up this ridiculous illusion that I’m talking to a human being. It's like a malicious version of the Turing Test.

How did society get me here? How did society get me talking to a robot pretending to be a human, at all costs not revealing that it’s a robot? You know I’d honestly prefer it if "Dave" was called Chatbot3000 or Excelsior or something - at least then, I’d know where we stand. 

I signed off the chat with “Thank you, Dave, have an optimal day. I'm closing the pod bay doors.” Dave just said I was welcome. 

If Dave is a real person, he has no sense of humour.