DRAGONS AND DRAWBRIDGES

Today I wondered whether I’d be spending the day trapped in the delivery entrance of the self storage centre.

It’s quite a boring story really, but it stems from the fact that I tried to help someone get in, worried about them being dodgy, helped them out again when their code didn’t work, and then couldn’t get back in myself… or out.

To be honest, the whole thing is quite a complicated system. It neatly demonstrates the modern tension between easy access and high security. Or to put it another way, the more dragons there are out there, the tighter you need to pull up your drawbridge.

Speaking of drawbridges, there is an entrance gate at Self Storage HQ which is closed out-of-hours. To open it, you need a code.

Now. The code for that changes every day but they do refresh it on an app. I had access to it, but when I arrived, a young man in a black tracksuit was already there and couldn’t get in. I let him in. But then when he couldn’t get into the inner courtyard, I also decided to politely let him out again.

The trouble is that I’d then technically both entered and left, so according to the computer I wasn’t there any more. When I went back to punch into the castle, the castle thought I was an intruder and disabled my code. The drawbridge was up, the castle was locked and I couldn’t get out. Perhaps it was only a matter of time before the elves swarmed through the court with pointy spears and carried me off to The Self Storage HQ Dungeons… which ironically might be Stuff Jail, where I was trying to get to anyway!

Well anyway. I phoned them up. They told me to refresh the app, and everything was fine.

It is a complicated system isn’t it? Two codes, three entrance panels, an automatic gate, a sliding shutter, alarms that go off if you get in wrong. Stuff Jail is secure yes, but as ever with high security it is inversely proportional to easy access.

When I came to leave, the gate was open. I think technically I was supposed to close it, then open it again to tell the computer I had left, but in the end I just drove out.

I have a funny feeling that the Self Storage HQ Castle Guards might think I’m still there.