CHILL-OUT-MINUTES DISCIPLINE

I walked into the kitchen this morning and boiled the kettle. We have a hot water boiler but to be honest it doesn't really live up to its name. You know where you are with a kettle.

Plus, with the kettle, you've got a couple of those all-important chill-out minutes. You know what I mean - extra minutes to slow life down rather than dashing in, whacking a tea bag into a mug, slopping lukewarm water over it and then pacing back to your desk. You've got to love the chill-out minutes.

I took a walk around the kitchen and found myself by the table-football. It was then that my naughty brain started up.

"You could hide the ball," it whispered.

"What? No way!" I exclaimed, inside my head.

"Ah go on, it'll be fun; you like a little fun. There it is, right there in the goal. It'd be so so easy... besides no-one will ever suspect it was you."

I started imagining the Finance Guys coming in at lunchtime, searching everywhere for the ball, desperate to play table-football. I'd sidle in and listen to them chatter while they anxiously looked through cupboards and under tables. It wouldn't be long before they started blaming the cleaners or rolled up a ball made of paper or sellotape or something.

I wouldn't like knowing I did that.

"No way," I said, deciding, "That is so childish."

The kettle bubbled and clicked, and I made my tea. Where in the world had that mischievous little thought come from? If I'd been clever enough to hide the ball somewhere ironic that the Finance Guys would definitely find (that would also give them a laugh) I might have been more daring - but this whole idea of spoiling someone else's noisy fun suddenly seemed really pathetic. I've never been one for practical japery for that exact reason - I'm just not clever enough at it.

Perhaps there's also a bit of discipline to learn with these newfangled chill-out minutes? I mean creating more time (or rather borrowing it from somewhere else) opens up a roomful of mischief and temptation. The devil, we're told, makes work for idle fingers. Horrible things have been done by bored people. Mind you, some of the world's greatest discoveries also happened by accident to people with nothing better to do.

Speaking of which, I accidentally just typed the word hooray with a capital Y at the end of it. It looks strangely appropriate. There you go, you can have that for free. Use it wisely.

HooraY!