Maybe this is how fashion starts. An individual forgets a belt one day and then six months later all the teenagers are walking round with their underpants hanging out of their jeans. Perhaps even years ago, Monsieur Cravate (I imagine) twiddled the ends of his moustachios and said to himself, 'Ah Monsieur Cravate you saucy French setter of the trends, if only there could be a way to hold zis ridiculously frilly shirt togetheur at the neck?
I'm not quite sure what the tie is for, actually. I can see it dying out. Even in my lifetime the bigwigs I've worked for, the preachers I've known and the executives who've strode by importantly have all abandoned the tie for open-necked shirt collars with a suit jacket. Weddings, funerals, interviews and court appearances are all still formal enough for the half-Windsor of course, but aside from that (and the cavalcade of red-faced politicians we all see every day at the moment) I very rarely see the tie, especially live and out here in the wild. I have a shoebox full of them, collecting dust somewhere.
'Monsieur Cravate, may I introduce to you, Monsieur Pierre de Button? Monsieur de Button has un invention ingenious! It uses the tiny silk threads and un petit disc of Ivory with holes in it. See how his chemise fastens together! C'est encroyable!'
'Encroyable indeed.'
Part of the problem is that no-one is really sure what the tie is for. I do think one day it will be as redundant as Tudor breeches or Victorian corset hoops. We'll look back at period dramas and ask ourselves why we half strangled ourselves with a useless piece of fabric, just to look like everyone else who was sweltering in the afternoon sun.
Someone has just told the security guard that his tie is hanging out and he is busily tucking it back into his jumper. That was a short lived fashion then. He looks a little embarrassed.
Come to think of it, security guards aren't usually at the forefront of what's cool are they? I won't be trying it.
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