OFF WORK WITH A CASE OF DULLNESS

I’m ill today. It started on Saturday, with a twitchy nose, a dry cough and a cracked throat. Then yesterday, I spent most of the day asleep - or at least trying to sleep. Last night I was hotter than the surface of the sun.

As a result of being sick then, I am also dull today.

I don’t mean boring; I mean I’m dimmed, lacklustre, a sweltering grey mass of pale duvet and t-shirt, sniffling and spluttering in front of YouTube documentaries and Twitter. I can almost hear the brain cells flicker out. Dull all the way.

Some of the tech-types on Twitter are a lot cleverer than me. I read their tweets twice and then think, ‘I’m probably not supposed to understand that.’ “You need a lens to focus... but you’re also supposed to stay aware of everything else?” ... you’re surprised that “being fixed on solving one problem is better than wading through a mountain of technical debt? Crickets, cognitive dissonance.” Er, what?

It doesn’t help with the dullness. I just don’t get it. But then I wonder whether I do that to people myself with my cryptic Twitter missives? Sometimes, it must be said, my tweets are probably only really for me - which isn’t really the point of Twitter, is it? But then, I’m not sure anyone has ever really defined what that is.

So, anyway, I’ve decided to try sharpening my brain up a bit. I can’t lie here all day, finding out about Auschwitz and Einstein and Lincoln and NASA and software product management. I can’t keep scrolling through celebrities’ feeds while they trumpet their own work, or tackle racists and anti-semites head on. I have to get up and do something constructive.

Actually, the first thing I have to do is get some food. The weather app says it’s 11 degrees, so I’ll pop on a coat and find my way to the shop for supplies. Maybe fruit, bread and a bottle of energy drink. Perhaps that will shine me up a bit. Then I’m going to learn some facts and write a quiz. I might even carry on reading my copy of ‘Critical Thinking Skills - Developing Effective Analysis and Argument.’ ... although the introduction scared me a bit last time I picked it up.

Hopefully I’ll be back to normal tomorrow, back to my usual effervescent, sparkling self. But I have a feeling that might take a bit more than a slice of toast and a bottle of Lucozade.