It occurred to me today that when we say, ‘yeah not too bad,’ in response to ‘how are you?’ we could also mean that we don’t want to talk about it.
This must be baffling for anyone else. But here’s the thing: if someone asks ‘How are you?’ and the response is, ‘Excellent!’ then the British thing to do, the rule, is to probe further and to ask why. There’s a story. You’re now allowed to ask. In fact, you’re expected to.
I’d recommend arching your eyebrows in surprise, smiling lightly and saying “Oh, really?” at this point.
I feel like I’ve waded in too deep to this topic now. Plenty of anthropologists and behaviour scientists can explain it all better. I just live here.
Speaking of just living here, my own conversational complexities happen in the little microculture of our house - where, mystifyingly there are rules about exactly what goes in which cupboards and why. I’ve been here for two years now and even I haven’t figured it out! So, you know, anthropologists welcome.
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